5 Crucial Lessons from My First 5 Years of Marriage: LESSON 2

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LESSON 2:  See My Own Sin Clearly—Why do you see the speck that is in your brother's eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? Matthew 7:3 (ESV)

I need to see my own sin, flaws and failures more quickly and more clearly than those of my wife. Every day pride seduces me to come down from the watchtower of my heart. “You’re not so bad. Your sin is far off. You haven’t done that in a while. You’re all good!” But it’s a lie. The truth is that sin lurks in and around every corner of my heart, and is woven into the fabric of everything I do. I must diligently practice a posture of oversight in every area of my life. 

Every time my wife annoys, attacks, or offends me, I need to immediately ask myself:

     “How have I contributed to this?"

     "What have I done recently that has similarly offended her?"

     "Why am I irritated?" 

     "How have I been failing her or how have I allowed her to arrive at a place where she is tempted to attack me?” 

Many times I may actually be innocent. But developing this discipline of “soul over-watch” has taught me that I’m far less innocent, far more often, than I think I am. I am able to see my own offenses and how they are often part of what provokes my wife to sin.